Tag Archives: Tallahassee foster parents

New Year, Same Me, New Goals

I have to do this – the obligatory New Year’s Resolutions blog post. I can’t help myself. So if you’re looking for something as basic and cringy as a pumpkin spice latte, then you’ve come to the right place.

RESOLUTION ONE:

Stop swearing like a sailor. I grew up on the Last Frontier and never grew out of it, so cut me some slack ok? But I’m trying to cut back. Like people who are addicted to cigarettes, I figure I can ease out of the habit. Maybe get down to one a day and then eventually quit altogether. Or just save it for when I am really losing it, or visiting the Last Frontier, maybe special occasions. You get the point. The bottom line is, it’s going to look bad if the foster kids go off to Pre-K with potty mouths, so I’ve got to rein it in.

RESOLUTION TWO:

Join a cult. I mean, who doesn’t love kool aid? Just kidding. Not THAT kind of cult. My cousin Sophie talked me into giving Orange Theory a shot so I signed up for 6 months of classes. There’s been some discussion of moving Spann Family Olympics (aka Christmas) to a new, and more tropical location, next year, so we have to be ready for it. Nothing like circuits and a pounding bass to get your butt in gear.

OMG “butt” isn’t a curse word, right?

RESOLUTION THREE:

Read more non-fiction. Technically, this was my resolution last year but I liked it so much, I figure I can just keep it going into 2019. My favorite nonfiction book that I read last year was Bad Blood. If you like crime books, you’ll probably love this one.

RESOLUTION FOUR:

Publish a blog post every week. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night feeling inspired and I write 3 posts in 20 minutes. But usually, that’s not the case. So my goal is to write even when it’s not easy, mostly because google’s algorithm cares very little about what my content actually says as long as my posting schedule is consistent.

If you have ideas for blog posts, or there’s something in particular you would like me to write about, I’m open to ideas, so share in the comments. The holidays are over and I could use some inspiration!

Foster Parenting: It’s Risky Business

The difficulties of foster parenting in Tallahassee, Florida

The other day I was at a junior league social. Yes, they let me in despite my short hair and lack of southern accent. At the social, everyone went around the room and shared something exciting that happened to them recently.

Of course, I shared that my husband and I just got licensed as foster parents.

One of the league ladies came up to me after and was gushing with excitement. She told me that her aunt was a foster parent and went on to share many wonderful stories about foster parenting.

I was happy to hear this and completely shocked at the same time.

My experience up to this point when we have told people we are going to be foster parents is 1) Whoa, I could never do that. Good for you. Immediately followed by 2) Let me tell you this horror story about a 6 yr old kid in care who murdered his foster family…

So, it was nice to meet someone normal who had something positive to say.

The Difficulties of Foster Parenting

It seems there’s a lot of people out there who aren’t foster parents but want to make it crystal clear to us how difficult fostering really is. As if we, the ones who sat through 8 weeks of classes, had hours of conversations about it and watched thousands of minutes of video on the subject, didn’t already know this.

Every night there are a million thoughts running through my head:

Will these kids be demons who slowly destroy our marriage? Will they destroy our new house? What if I forget to lock the pool gate and they drown? What if we fall in love with them and they go back to drug-addled parents? It it really possible for your heart to ACTUALLY break? Will the bureaucracy of the system put me in therapy? How expensive is therapy? Are we ruining our lives by doing this or saving someone else’s? How are we going to work full time and be parents AND deal with all the court stuff that goes along with this?

I don’t have answers to any of those questions. It’s a pretty big risk. And to be honest, it might suck and we may decide after one placement that we just can’t do it.

But then again, maybe we can.

I guess that’s the thing about taking risks.

You won’t know how it’ll turn out unless you try.

Babysitting: aka Our Foster Kid Field Test

Practicing our parenting (and) baking skills, with our niece

Last weekend, we babysat our 6 year old niece, Logan. I didn’t tell her mother, but the last time I was responsible for keeping a child alive was when I was 16. I showed up at the house at 9 pm. The baby was already asleep, so I just sat out on the couch and read until her parents came home. I couldn’t figure out how the TV remote worked (the life of a home school kid in Alaska).

Actually, if memory serves me correctly, I was petrified of sudden infant death syndrome. I went into the nursery and held my hand under her nose at least 3 times to make sure she was still breathing.

However, my husband and I are now certified foster parents. We have a thank you letter from Governor Rick Scott to prove it. So, I suppose that makes us qualified to babysit.

As a Parent You Learn Simple Tasks Take Longer

It went great. I was worried, so I do what I always do and made a long list of activities. I figured if I got her tired and kept her occupied, she wouldn’t have time to miss her parents. Really, I probably could have only planned two activities because everything takes twice as long with kids. We made cookies. We colored. I learned the entire dance to Wave Walker (which was impromptu and not on the list but very fun. If anyone’s interested in learning, I know a girl).

Even dinner took a long time, but I think that was because she didn’t want to eat broccoli so she just kept putting pieces into her mouth, chewing it up and storing it in her cheeks like a chipmunk until Uncle Thomas told her she could spit it out, because picky eaters gotta look out for one another.

So I’m feeling overly confident about the foster parent thing now that we made it through our trial run. Logan seemed like she had a great time, so I would say we passed. I will probably start giving advice to random parents standing in the line at the grocery store, because nothing says “parent” quite like mommy wars.

Finding Daycare for Working Parents in Tallahassee

On that note, I’m about to join the working-parents-who-put-their-kids-in-daycare team when the fosters arrive, so I’ve been doing some research on that front. I was shocked that I couldn’t find a comprehensive list of daycares by geographic area. There are a couple of lists that divide them up by faith-based or education based. However, doesn’t it seem more practical to have them by zip code? This way, people can make a short list based on where their house or work is located? Am I approaching this wrong? Tallahassee moms, IS THERE A SECRET LIST I DON’T KNOW ABOUT?!

Unless I hear otherwise, I am currently working on creating one myself. When I’m done, I’m going to put it online. Any Tallahassee moms or future moms will have someplace to start with the daycare search. Or they can just leave a nasty comment about daycare kids and horrible parenting. Those comments will be more fun to respond to anyway.

And on that note, I’m out. But seriously, if you have words of wisdom when it comes to kiddos, leave it in the comments. Be nice, we’re new at this!